Chance of a Shower...

 I love showers.

 I used to love baths, but now just the word bath conjures up images of a flooded bathroom, flying bath toys, and someone either screaming at me that they don't want to get in the bath, or screaming at me that they don't want to get out of the bath.

So baths don't really do it for me anymore.

Now, I'm all about the shower.

Jimmy says I take too long and waste water. I probably do. But I figure what I waste in water, I save in money not spent on psych meds.

I think it started when I had a newborn and realized that it was possible to go for days without having time to take a shower. I also realized that, when you finally do have time to take one, showers are new mom utopia.

Yes, I would have thought that was a ridiculous statement before I had kids, too.

It's all relative.

Fortunately, I get to shower every day now. Try not to be jealous. And keep in mind, I said I get to shower. I didn't say I get to shower in peace.

I usually get a whole four minutes to myself before someone interrupts me. Four minutes might be OK if my shower was strictly functional.

But it's not.

I think in the shower. It's often the only place I can.

I plan our day--and sometimes our week-- in the shower. Just in my head, of course. I tried bringing my planner in with me, but it didn't go so well.

Some days, I plan future vacations in the shower. The ones I will take by myself.

I even pray in the shower. I figure God doesn't care. He's probably just happy to hear me complete an entire thought without stopping in the middle of it to tell someone not to hit their brother.

So, yeah, I guess you could say my showers are sacred.

If only the kids would realize that. Maybe they wouldn't come find me after four minutes to tell me that someone changed the channel on the TV. Or that someone was sitting too close to them. Or that someone was breathing next to them.

Today N interrupted me to tell me that the dog had bad breath.

I thought maybe that was my sign to institute a new policy. It's called "Don't bother mommy in the shower unless you are bleeding. Profusely. And it won't stop. And the 911 people need my signature to take you to the hospital".

And they better have a water proof pen.