What Did You Do Today?

I'm never sure how to answer this question. Most days, I've done so many things that I can't even remember them all, but I'm not sure any of them would be remotely interesting to the person asking the question. But I realized that there is one thing that I probably do more than anything else. So, the next time someone asks me what I did today, I'm just going to tell them:  Well, as usual, I did alot of different things, but mostly, you know, I just wiped.

I wiped the sleep out of my eyes.
I wiped a bum or two.
I wiped the counters.
I wiped a nose.
I wiped some tears.

I wiped crayon off the walls and day old mascara off of my eyes.
I wiped jelly off of the counters...and the floor...and the TV.
I wiped another bum, another nose, and a few more tears.
I wiped something off the refrigerator. Don't ask me what. I couldn't tell you.

I wiped lipstick off the bathroom sink..and the mirror...and the toilet.
I wiped yogurt off the windows...at least I think it was yogurt.
I wiped another bum, and oh yeah, I wiped my hands, after I washed them, of course.

And when I wasn't wiping, I was talking about wiping.

Wipe that grin off your face. And wipe the ketchup off, too.
Don't forget to wipe your mouth. And your hands.
Did you wipe out again?
Don't you dare wipe off my kisses.
Don't forget to wipe.

Some days, it seems, are all about wiping. Like when I go to the grocery store at closing time, to buy wipes. And I burst into inappropriate laughter as the manager throws a roll of paper towels to the cashier and says "Here--wipe your own." I feel a need to explain, so I say "He just told you to wipe your own!" and then I laugh some more. I am not laughing quite so hard when the cashier, now also laughing, yells to her co-worker across the store, "This lady just told me to wipe my @$$!". Well, not exactly. In truth, I am just giddy with excitement at the mere thought that someone, somewhere, can wipe their own...something. I can't wait to get home so I can try the manager's technique at home with my own kids.

I'd like to stay and ask you what you did today, but I'm just about wiped out--or will be, as soon as I wipe the one thing I didn't find time to wipe today.